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Preparing for Lunar New Year

As we approach Chinese New Year, many are busy with last-minute holiday planning, shopping and planning to gather with friends and family. It is a special time we connect with family and loved ones and a time to reflect on our relationships with ourselves and others.


For some, it’s a time to evaluate our progress on New Year’s resolutions. Have we set clear and tangible goals that help cultivate healthy habits and bring us closer to finding fulfilment in our lives?


Now might also be the time to consider if we are dedicating enough quality time to our loved ones. If not, why have we not made time for them?  In the early stages of most relationships,  we prioritize time together, exploring each other’s worlds. However, as resentment and ambivalence creep in,  we may start to distance ourselves.  We spend less quality time together, which was once fulfilling and enjoyable, and we become less willing to see things from our partner’s perspective.


For many, being together yet feeling alone, or staying for the sake of children or financial reasons can breed resentment. Repairing a relationship is a herculean task, especially if infidelity is involved. However, breaking up may seem premature if the foundation is strong and the relationship was good previously but has lost its spark.


Some view divorce as an easy way out, but it is not so simple when children are involved.  You will still need to co-parent with your partner for the rest of your lives if you truly love your chil/dren.


Before you give up, consider speaking with a counsellor alongside your partner for one last chance to address your issues. If your partner is unwilling to attend, insightful resources are available, such as "Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay" by Mira Kirshenbaum, which can help guide you in making the best decision for both of you.


Remember, if you’re unhappy, your partner likely feels unloved. The best gift you can give yourself and your partner this Chinese New year might be a second chance at happiness.



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