Childhood trauma can take many forms: medical emergencies or accidents, separation and loss, witnessing frightening events, and physical or sexual abuse. These experiences shape how the nervous system develops and how it responds to stress long after the original events are over.​

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Traumatic events often leave behind a wide range of symptoms that are not always recognised as trauma‑related.  People may describe themselves as “just anxious”, “too sensitive”, “bad at relationships” or “not resilient enough”, without realising that these patterns are understandable responses to earlier threat.​

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How trauma shows up at work

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Workplaces are full of ordinary pressures: deadlines, performance reviews, disagreements and organisational change.  For someone with unresolved trauma, these situations can feel far more intense, as if their whole safety or worth is on the line.​

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You might notice:

• Persistent fear of making mistakes or being judged, even when feedback is broadly positive.

• A strong inner critic that tells you you are failing, no matter how hard you work.​

• Difficulty setting boundaries, saying yes to everything and edging towards burnout.

• Feeling disproportionately shaken by conflict with colleagues or comments from managers, long after the conversation has ended.                               

Some people swing between perfectionism and procrastination—over‑preparing to avoid any criticism, then freezing when a task feels emotionally loaded.  Others keep changing jobs or roles, hoping a new environment will finally feel safe, without realising that their nervous system is still scanning for danger.​

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How trauma shows up in relationships

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Close relationships can activate old wounds very quickly.  When early experiences taught that closeness is unsafe, inconsistent or conditional, the body may struggle to relax even with a caring partner.​

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Trauma can manifest in relationships as:

• Choosing partners who repeat familiar patterns of criticism, withdrawal or control.

• Feeling extremely anxious when someone pulls away, or shutting down when they move closer.​

• Reacting strongly to small disagreements because they tap into older experiences of rejection, shame or fear.

• Difficulty trusting that someone will stay, even when there is no clear sign they will leave.

These are not signs that you are “too broken for relationships”.  They are signs that your nervous system has learned to prioritise survival over connection and is still trying to protect you using old strategies that once made sense.​

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Mind–body links

Trauma is carried not only in thoughts and emotions, but also in the body.  Research links childhood adversity to a heightened stress response and increased risk of chronic health problems in adulthood.​

Symptoms can include:

• Muscle tension, headaches, stomach issues or sleep difficulties that worsen under stress.

• Chronic pain, fatigue or other medically unexplained symptoms that flare during conflict at work or at home.​

• Feeling “on edge” much of the time, or alternately numb and disconnected from your own body.

Because these symptoms can look like “just stress” or “just being busy”, many people never have the chance to consider that trauma may be part of the picture.​

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How a psychodynamic approach can help

In a psychodynamic and attachment‑based approach, the work gently links past experiences with how you feel and respond in the present.

Together, we make connections between earlier relationships, current patterns at work and in intimacy, and the body’s stress responses, so that these experiences can be understood and gradually integrated in a more manageable way.

Over time, this can bring a greater sense of coherence, emotional regulation and choice.​

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Making sense and seeking support

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Acknowledging trauma does not mean blaming yourself or your family. It means recognising that your mind and body adapted to difficult circumstances, and that these adaptations may now be getting in the way of the life and relationships you want.​

Therapy offers a space to explore how trauma is showing up at work and in relationships, at a pace that feels manageable.  Together, it becomes possible to understand what your nervous system is trying to protect you from, and to experiment with new ways of responding that create more safety and freedom in the present.​

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If you recognise yourself in any of this and would like to explore how trauma may be affecting your work or relationships, you are welcome to book an initial consultation to consider what kind of support might be helpful for you now.